I lose motivation in the middle of my long runs. About half way through I start thinking things like, "I am never going to make it!" or "This was not such a good idea." or "What was I thinking?" But the thing about mid-run motivation issues is: it is really too late to turn back. There is nothing to do but press on. And then, anywhere from half a mile to a mile later, the motivation returns. I love running again. A fresh wave of energy courses through and I usually finish well...with some exceptions of course.
The end of the week in Zhengzhou found me in my mid-run motivation slump. I was missing my kids at home so much it hurt. Howie was still not bonding all that well with me (which is really hard by the way! My adult self remembers he has suffered a great loss...and comes from a very hard place...and a little time and space and room to grieve will make all the difference. But my selfish self wants to be loved in return.) Those last couple of days, followed by an extremely long day of stressful travel were my mid run slump.
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| Robert trying herbal tea. (Howie is sticking to water.) |
I woke up this morning (Happy Easter!) knowing only 5 more sleeps until we head into an even longer day of travel...but on the other end will be my precious children whose voices and faces I crave. I love China. I do love it. But it would be better with my babies here with me. Life is not complete without them.
And so...we are at the end of run, crazy motivated to finish well side of the trip. We had a great day today exploring Guangzhou and our new hotel. I got to catch up with a sweet guide who is just precious to me. I had a great time exploring a city I love with Robert, who missed it last time, and our newest baby who is getting healthier everyday.
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| Enjoying the hotel playground |
Howie is doing well. He still loves his Daddy best of all, but he has fun with Mommy too. I am eager to get home to consult with a few doctors about some medical issues...but he seems to be developmentally right on target. He is all boy...runs, throws, jumps, builds, knocks down, makes a mess in the bath...everything a healthy 3 year old loves. He loves seeing his big brothers and little sisters on FaceTime. I can't wait to have them all together!
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| He loves Magformers as much as his siblings! |
I lose motivation in the middle of my long runs. About half way through I start thinking things like, "I am never going to make it!" or "This was not such a good idea." or "What was I thinking?" But the thing about mid-run motivation issues is: it is really too late to turn back. There is nothing to do but press on. And then, anywhere from half a mile to a mile later, the motivation returns. I love running again. A fresh wave of energy courses through and I usually finish well...with some exceptions of course.
And so...we are at the end of run, crazy motivated to finish well side of the trip. We had a great day today exploring Guangzhou and our new hotel. I got to catch up with a sweet guide who is just precious to me. I had a great time exploring a city I love with Robert, who missed it last time, and our newest baby who is getting healthier everyday.
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