Registration, Notarization, and Passports (Tuesday in Zhengzhou)

Yesterday was a very long day of paperwork, waiting, and government offices. The most important part about the day is that Laura officially became a Zopp.

We started the day at the Registration office where the adoption was finalized and we received our adoption certificate saying Laura is officially ours. Second, we went to the notary office for notarization of the adoption certificates and then ended the day at the passport photo/application offices where Laura's picture was taken and we applied for her passport that will allow her to travel to the United States next week when we go home.

We did a lot of waiting! 

At the Registration office where the adoption was finalized.

The registration official congratulated us and invited us all to come back again. 

Our official adoption certificate

Outside the registration office...Laura loves Mum Mum rice crackers. She ate them basically all day long. 

Robert says, "that's what you did, but how are you doing?" We are doing...okay. It is lonely here without my Robert and family. It is especially lonely when I have questions and concerns and none of my people to talk them out with me. And, often I just wish for Robert to be here so I can shoot him a look that he will be able to interpret without my having to talk at all.

Laura is grieving and scared. She has a very intense fear of my leaving her. She also has some institutional behavior that is easier to read about than it is to see in your child. I find myself wondering how much of her personality am I actually seeing, or am I seeing any of her real self yet? Is this all grief? I look forward to days, weeks, months down the road when I see the real her.

She is eating well now, solid foods and from the bottle as well. So, that is wonderful. And, yesterday she showed me that all her plumbing works as well, which was a relief too. No signs of parasites either...also something to be thankful for!

She has adapted to the open palate enough that she can suck relatively well (as long as the hole is big enough) and she does not often have food coming out her nose. In fact, I am wondering if the orphanage did a partial repair on her palate. (I tried looking in her mouth, but I am not sure what I am seeing. There is a hole but I don't think it is as large as it was before her lip surgery.) She does get food stuck in the hole in her mouth. Today I had to scoop out fried eggs that had gotten stuck. Not a pleasant experience for either of us...much worse for her than for me.

We are learning each other and I hope she is starting to trust me. Counting down the days to home...

Not sleeping at 4 a.m. 

Sleeping on Mommy...the only place she sleeps. 

Gotcha Day

Finally Gotcha is here and we begin the rest of the story. All the waiting for this tiny girl is over. She is here, in my arms, sleeping on me because she cries every time I put her down.

This morning our travel group met at 9:30 to take the bus to a government building where all the children were delivered to us by orphanage officials.

There are 16 families in our group adopting 18 children. Today, I was honored to witness one child after another be handed into the arms of their forever families. Every child reacted differently. Some were terrified, others seemed to be in a state of shock. Some just eased right into life with their family with giggles and play. What an amazing thing to see families be formed. Orphans become daughters and sons.

Zhou Hui Jing, our Laura Catherine, came in on the hip of the director of her orphanage. I recognized her sweet face from afar but was surprised at how tiny she is! She is much smaller than we anticipated. We were told 20 pounds, but there is no way she is that big. The orphanage director pointed at me and said "Ma-ma" to Laura and handed her over.

Laura was unsure at first. She cried a little...I am sure I look so strange to her! Nothing like the women who have been caring for her. She warmed up quickly though. She ate mum-mum crackers I brought and played with the ball with me. She asks to be picked up by lifting her arms toward me.

My prayers that she feel safe with me have been answered. She has not left my hip/chest since we arrived at the hotel. She definitely has a lot of anxiety and fear but I am glad she finds comfort, even if just a little bit, with me. Praying she will feel secure and relax in the next few days.

I am concerned about her nutrition and health. She is refusing the bottle from me and she is so thin...I want to make sure she gets enough to eat. She wouldn't take the bottle today, so I fed her solid food and she seemed to enjoy it.

Tomorrow we will finalize the adoption at the local registration office and will apply for her passport as well.

China: The first 3 days

Somehow, I left China on Friday and now I have finally arrived in Zhengzhou and it is Sunday afternoon here. My internal clock is completely messed up! I want so much for it to be bedtime, but even if it was...it definitely doesn't feel like it should be Sunday night already. I am purposely not sleeping right now so that I can sleep tonight. Let me just say...bed sounds awfully nice right now.

The flights over were long but uneventful. We flew up over the North Pole and then back down to China. Today (Sunday), I met several other families who have traveled to adopt their little ones. We all rode the bullet train together from Beijing to Zhengzhou. The train was fabulous! After two days on airplanes and in airports, it was lovely to get to stretch out and enjoy the scenic drive. We rode through miles and miles of China countryside...farm after farm after farm. I watched people working their crops and herding their animals. I am thankful for the relaxing train ride.

Just outside the train station in Beijing

Train Station entrance

Escalator down to the train loading dock

View from the train

View from the train 

Where I am staying now is quite the opposite of country. I am in the middle of Zhengzhou City, horns honking below and smog covering the roof tops. In about an hour, all the families are getting together to walk to the local Walmart to get diapers, formula, and snacks for our little ones.

Tomorrow is the day I meet Laura! I will meet her on Monday morning here (Sunday night in the States). I am so excited! I praying for her heart. I hope she feels loved and safe with me. I hope we attach to one another quickly and enjoy the next couple of weeks getting to know each other.

Last Weekend as a Family of 6...

I am missing William's 8th birthday during my trip to China. I cannot even begin to explain the great amount of Mama Guilt plaguing me because of this! Everyone says not to worry about, but a baby's birthday is a big deal, and he will always be my first baby. I am so sad to miss it.

We spent this past Saturday celebrating early and enjoying a weekend of sweet family moments. We drove up to the big Lego Store in Downtown Disney and he got to take his pick on the Lego sets. He was thrilled!

Lego Store! 

There was great debate over which set...this one was the winner!

Ice cream after lunch

We are so happy to live so close to Aunt BB and Uncle Gino!
Treats at the candy store. 

When we got home, he and Andrew sat down at the table and put together all 500 pieces in about 2 hours.

He requested a homemade birthday cake (chocolate cake with vanilla icing, "but, Mommy, can you make the icing look chocolate so we can trick everyone?")

As the days tick by, and I am now only 3 big sleeps away from flying around the world, I find I am hugging them all a bit tighter.  My life is small, but I love it. I love rocking my Rachel Beth as she sucks her thumb and drifts off to sleep. I love snuggling with Jacob when he finally settles down enough for me to snuggle. I love chatting with William and Andrew, playing games with them and reading big kid books together. And of course I love having Robert here during all of it...and the few quiet moments we have in between the kids going to the bed and me going to bed. I will miss them so much! I cannot even imagine 14 days away. 14 days.

But, on the other side of the world is my daughter who has never known the love of a mommy and daddy. She has never had a home. On Monday, she will have her "birth day"...her birth into her forever family. As much as I am aching for the babies I am leaving, I am also so anxious and excited to meet our girl and bring her home to this small life we love.

Laura Cate. I am loving that sprout of hair!

Laura's Palate

Our Laura was born with a cleft lip and palate. Cleft lip and/or palate is actually the most common birth defect. In the United States, 1 of every 600 births is affected by a cleft lip and/or palate. Some children are born with just a cleft lip, some with just a cleft palate, and some with both. There is also varying degrees and severity of the cleft (how large the openings are in the lip and mouth.)

Laura's cleft lip was fixed in China, when she was about 9 months old. However, her palate remains open. Although she has figured out how to eat with her open palate, she is unable to suck and chew properly. Food often comes out her nose and she cannot use basic "baby" items like sippy cups, bottles, etc, because she is unable to suck. She will have surgery when we get home to repair the hole in her mouth. I am thankful to have found an ENT I trust who will examine her a few days after we get home and then help us decide on how and when to move forward on her surgery. Laura needs her palate to learn to eat and speak properly.  However, the surgery is intense and painful. We are praying for discernment on timing.

Travel Approval!

Our prayers were answered when we received Travel Approval from China the morning of September 25, just one day shy of all the holidays in China! The notice came in an email with two possible travel dates. I am leaving for China in just 14 days, on Friday October 16. I will have Laura in my arms for the first time on Monday October 19 and she will be in her forever home and with her forever family on Friday October 30.

I have been slow in posting this news because I am still having a hard time articulating the many, many emotions running through  me right now. For us, our adoption journey has been long and twisting. We have had struggles. We have had surprises...good and bad. We have had dead ends and redirection. And now, finally, finally we have this sweet daughter waiting on us and in just two weeks and two days she will be ours. Really ours. In four weeks, she will be here at home with us. She will play on the floor with Rachel (and probably fight over Mommy's lap with Rachel.) She will watch her big brothers in wonder. I am sure she will have a favorite sibling...and I wonder which one it will be. For the first time in her life, she will have toys that belong to her. There will always be food to eat when she is hungry and arms to hold her when she is sad. She will have a family. She will have a home. We feel excited and relieved that she is finally coming home soon!

I feel absolutely in awe as I look back on the past few years and how the Lord has walked with us along this long journey. I look back at big shouts and small whispers. The giant leaps and tiny steps. At the many ways He has spoken to us and encouraged us and walked with us along the way. I remember telling my sister in law during a particularly rough patch that although there was sadness, His presence was almost palpable. I felt like He was sitting next to me. Truly, He works in us for His glory and to bring us closer to Him. I can say both Robert and I have come to more fully understand the power of prayer and the reality that He does answer. For all these things, I am so thankful to the Lord who called us to this blessed journey.

As for the actual travel, I have what can only be described as peace that surpasses understanding. I will be traveling alone to China for our Laura. Because of the demands of an already large family, Robert will stay home with the children and take care of their daily needs while I am gone. I believe it is because I know he will be here with them that I feel peace in going. We thought it best that Laura bond with me first since I will be the primary caretaker once we are home.

Although I am at peace with our decision regarding who is traveling, I do feel a lot of sadness about leaving all my loves. As a stay at home mom, I literally never leave. Not for longer than a few hours anyway. So, this will be new and very different and I know I will miss Robert and all my babies like crazy while I am gone. I am thankful for cell phones and video chat and text messaging. All those things will help. However, I know when I am traveling home on the 30th, I will be aching to hold them all!

As you think of us over the next few weeks, I would ask you to pray for Robert and the children here at home. That he would have endurance and never ending patience as he fills the rolls of Mommy and Daddy for two weeks. Please pray for Laura as she goes through an incredibly hard transition. Although we love her already, we are strangers to her. She will be leaving all she knows. Pray she attaches to me in China and feels safe and loved. Please pray for a healthy and safe trip for Laura and me! And pray for this momma's heart, that the Lord will continue to reveal Himself to me as I travel alone and provide me with comfort when I am missing my family at home.

Blessed by your friendship! Thank you in advance for your prayers! Much love. xoxo

Catching Up

Clearly, I am not the world's best blogger...frequently, I'll think in the middle of the day, "I should write tonight about..." and then evening comes, all the children are finally asleep, and I do not have enough brain activity to attempt to blog. So...here is an effort to catch up on our activity.

Our big boys started school a few weeks ago. After two years of schooling at home, we are giving public school a try. So far, it is wonderful! We have a delightful neighborhood school. Robert is able to take them to school on his way to work and I pick them up shortly after lunch. The school day is shorter here (than it is in Texas), which is so much easier on the kids.

First Day of School

I was particularly anxious about Andrew's transition. He is such a home body! The child would stay in his pajamas at home everyday if he could. But, he loves his teacher. She is an answer to many prayers. He has enjoyed school very much this year. He gets in the car bubbling with excitement and stories to tell me about his day.

Andrew's class pet. He enjoyed taking care of him for the weekend...although he decided guinea pigs are too stinky for us to have as pets at our house. I am glad for that decision. :) 

William has always been excited about school. He is delighted to be going to school as well, but we expected that from him. He is always eager to learn new things and meet new people.

My big boy working on his homework. 

While the big boys are at school everyday, the littles and I enjoy some uninterrupted baby time. It has actually been nice to have a few hours a day to do toddler/baby centered activities without any guilt about neglecting the needs of my big kids.

Taking a walk on the bay.

This is Rachel's hilarious "Say Cheese" face. Goofy girl.

Update on Laura and our adoption timeline: we spent about three and a half weeks waiting on approval from USCIS. Once that came in, our paperwork was sent to the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou where they will issue an Article 5 and then China's CCCWA will give us travel approval. We are expecting our Article 5 on Monday. China has a couple of national holidays coming up. A three day autumn festival the last week of September and then National Week the first week of October. Paperwork will not move during these holidays. We are praying we have travel approval before the autumn festival. We would very much like to have our travel on the calendar next week and be traveling during the middle of October.

In the mean time, we are getting ready for our new addition! We put together a car seat and bought an extra high chair. There is a crib that needs to be assembled sitting on the floor of our study. I have a stack of clothes to pack and bought Laura a little red, white, and blue outfit for the day we visit the U.S. Consulate.

We were so excited to get a little snapshot of our girl. Another family who visited the orphanage a few weeks ago, took this picture. The baby sitting on the mattress in the diaper is our Laura Cate! We were so happy to see her looking well. We also found out from the same family that Laura is in a Show Hope room of the orphanage. Which means that instead of being cared for by the government institution, she has been cared for by the ministry of Show Hope.

Snapshot of Laura from August 2015

Show Hope will be able to share more information about Laura's medical history and also give us any photos they have of her once the adoption is final. It will be wonderful to have a few more pieces of her history. Can't wait to hold her!